Each time the ticker above marks a single number, I can’t describe how I feel. Besides reminding myself that yes, it’s really happening and it’s happening soon, I can’t help but realize that time waits for no man. Or woman, like me. I have decided that with every month closer to the wedding date, I will try my very best to share with you a little something either about us or my wedding preparation. A friend suggested that I share tips on how to prepare for a wedding. But I don’t think I’m in the position to do so as one’s taste and opinion differs from the other. So I wouldn’t ever want to come up with statements like ‘I hate gothic weddings’ and hurt the feelings of those who love such weddings because it would come across like as if I am criticizing your opinion and choice. You do it your way and I’ll do it my way on the highway ok? J Of course I can write about MY wedding and MY experience and MY choice of vendors because that’s entirely mine and my choice alone. But to come up with a list of ‘tips’, it’s never appropriate unless you’re Camelia ke (referring to fashion tips) or Razak Ahmad (the florist) or Chef Wan (referring to cooking tips). Questions asked will be entertained but no ‘guideline’ whatsoever. Because I selalu gelakkan tips tips from amateurs ni so takkan suddenly I want to come up with my own? I will never hear the end of it from my fiancé. Hehe.
So what I’m going to share with you today is about the decision.
I’ve never really talked openly about how it happened. We didn’t plan it at all. Sure we talked about marriage before but it was never serious. Yes, it was definitely something we both wanted for our relationship but we didn’t have anything in mind yet. But even though we didn’t plan it, I believe He planned it for us. He planned it with a twist of fate. And we all believe in fate, don’t we?
It happened right after he was transferred to Kedah – a situation I’ve never imagined myself to be caught in. I thought the misery would be too much for me to handle. And I guess it would have been, if that fateful morning didn’t turn out the way it did. We were having breakfast together (one of my favourite meals to share, by the way) at our usual farewell spot. The place was not fancy at all. He didn’t see it coming. I didn’t see it coming. We were just talking on and on about God knows what when suddenly, we just made the decision together! He went along the lines of “let's get married” which sounds totally drama melayu but absolutely the sweetest thing to my ears. He did not ask, I did not answer. We both agreed to take the leap and made the decision in five minutes. I took out my phone and checked the calendar and found my perfect date. It’s funny how things work sometimes, and it was never funnier than that day. Like I’ve always said, it’s like the whole force of the universe came together for us (cehhhh but biar la!). Suddenly we got super excited about it and started grinning like two mad cows and there were butterflies in my tummy. The way I look at it, it was something we both knew would happen eventually because we would’ve wanted nothing less for what we have, so it was never a question of whether I’d say yes or not. It was a decision to be made together and we both came to that decision at the right place and the right time. I will never forget that morning. With my sleepy eyes and kosong face, I may not have looked my best but dalam hati, I was just buzzingggg. The whole body automatically shifted its mood. My face felt hot from all the restraining I had to do. I had to restrain myself from jumping up and down. I had to restrain myself from breaking into tears. (Actually, tears tu dah ada since morning because remember, it was our farewell breakfast? hehe) Just because there was no ring, or candles or soft music, it does not make it any less special or perfect for me. To me, it was just about the best thing that could ever happen in my life (before the wedding, that is…hehe).
It was fate who proposed to us. Fate can only take you so far, because once you’re there, it’s up to you to make it happen. It’s so true! His transfer was an eye-opener. There’s definitely hikmah behind the distance. Who knows, maybe if he’s still here in KL, we’d still be taking our own sweet time and not decide on marriage yet. I guess we would never know. There’s a reason behind everything and maybe His reason for separating us is to make us come to this realization? Only He knows. And now that we’ve made this decision, we pray and hope that that is His plan for us too.
So yes, there you go. The proposal, decision, or whatever you call it. It was different. The approach was totally practical, straight-forward. Hehe. Would I have wanted it to be done in any other way? Definitely – if I was in love with another man. But I’m not and this man that I DO know - I know him too well to know that he is not the romantic kind or the kind who would be able to keep a surprise to himself. He’d probably end up asking me how to surprise me! Hehe. But I know this is what I’m in for, and because of that, I wouldn’t want to change it for the world. As long as he did it with utmost sincerity, I am all yours baby! All yours.
Ps: maybe lepas kahwin I can force/bully him to write my name in the clouds or rent a billboard or get down on his knees with a ring or take out a one page ad in The Star or something. Hehe. But I know, out of all the things I may be, ridiculous I am not.
So what I’m going to share with you today is about the decision.
I’ve never really talked openly about how it happened. We didn’t plan it at all. Sure we talked about marriage before but it was never serious. Yes, it was definitely something we both wanted for our relationship but we didn’t have anything in mind yet. But even though we didn’t plan it, I believe He planned it for us. He planned it with a twist of fate. And we all believe in fate, don’t we?
It happened right after he was transferred to Kedah – a situation I’ve never imagined myself to be caught in. I thought the misery would be too much for me to handle. And I guess it would have been, if that fateful morning didn’t turn out the way it did. We were having breakfast together (one of my favourite meals to share, by the way) at our usual farewell spot. The place was not fancy at all. He didn’t see it coming. I didn’t see it coming. We were just talking on and on about God knows what when suddenly, we just made the decision together! He went along the lines of “let's get married” which sounds totally drama melayu but absolutely the sweetest thing to my ears. He did not ask, I did not answer. We both agreed to take the leap and made the decision in five minutes. I took out my phone and checked the calendar and found my perfect date. It’s funny how things work sometimes, and it was never funnier than that day. Like I’ve always said, it’s like the whole force of the universe came together for us (cehhhh but biar la!). Suddenly we got super excited about it and started grinning like two mad cows and there were butterflies in my tummy. The way I look at it, it was something we both knew would happen eventually because we would’ve wanted nothing less for what we have, so it was never a question of whether I’d say yes or not. It was a decision to be made together and we both came to that decision at the right place and the right time. I will never forget that morning. With my sleepy eyes and kosong face, I may not have looked my best but dalam hati, I was just buzzingggg. The whole body automatically shifted its mood. My face felt hot from all the restraining I had to do. I had to restrain myself from jumping up and down. I had to restrain myself from breaking into tears. (Actually, tears tu dah ada since morning because remember, it was our farewell breakfast? hehe) Just because there was no ring, or candles or soft music, it does not make it any less special or perfect for me. To me, it was just about the best thing that could ever happen in my life (before the wedding, that is…hehe).
It was fate who proposed to us. Fate can only take you so far, because once you’re there, it’s up to you to make it happen. It’s so true! His transfer was an eye-opener. There’s definitely hikmah behind the distance. Who knows, maybe if he’s still here in KL, we’d still be taking our own sweet time and not decide on marriage yet. I guess we would never know. There’s a reason behind everything and maybe His reason for separating us is to make us come to this realization? Only He knows. And now that we’ve made this decision, we pray and hope that that is His plan for us too.
So yes, there you go. The proposal, decision, or whatever you call it. It was different. The approach was totally practical, straight-forward. Hehe. Would I have wanted it to be done in any other way? Definitely – if I was in love with another man. But I’m not and this man that I DO know - I know him too well to know that he is not the romantic kind or the kind who would be able to keep a surprise to himself. He’d probably end up asking me how to surprise me! Hehe. But I know this is what I’m in for, and because of that, I wouldn’t want to change it for the world. As long as he did it with utmost sincerity, I am all yours baby! All yours.
Ps: maybe lepas kahwin I can force/bully him to write my name in the clouds or rent a billboard or get down on his knees with a ring or take out a one page ad in The Star or something. Hehe. But I know, out of all the things I may be, ridiculous I am not.
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